Most of the people in this world try and stick to the "straight and narrow", not because they want to get to heaven, but because they don't want to go to hell. Regardless of how ill founded that line of reasoning might be, we may already be there.
I have witnessed the death of four loved ones; I have tearfully said my good-byes and yet I have found no closure. What I have found is the magnificent multitude of unique behaviors that a life time of living produces in a human being have suddenly vanished. Yes, there are my memories, but those dim pictures of reality are a poor attempt to re-create that which is forever gone.